by Lezah Rutherford

She glanced up at the window as she got out of the taxi, knowing she would not have to ring the bell.

He was there, waiting.

The small corner of her mind that still held reservations about the sensibility, or not, of her current course of action, kicked in.

“Do you KNOW what you’re doing?” it asked.

“Yes” she answered herself firmly. There were only two courses of action she could realistically follow. (The third was, ignore it and it will go away, which was not remotely possible.) She could leave things as they were, each knowing they wanted the other, but never taking the final step. Still meeting, still talking, the attraction between them forever impinging on daily life. Or, she could do what she was doing now, as she climbed the stairs to the third floor flat where he lived alone. Settle the physical thing once and for all!

She didn’t love him. Not with the sort of love that wanted to be with him always; or to share their lives.  She just…needed him…to quench the physical compulsion that had manifested itself on their second meeting.  (Or so she had convinced herself, refusing to listen to any alternatives.)

She had felt desire before. Heavens, she was fifty-two years old, twice married, and had played the field during the ‘swinging sixties’ of her youth. Peter, her husband of seventeen years was all she could reasonably expect in a partner.  Kind, considerate, (as much if not more than most men she knew) and they had ‘clicked’ the first time they met, emotionally and physically!

But this man, this self confessed hedonist, had turned her on, without a word or a touch! It was as if, she thought, their auras, that invisible field that surrounds every living thing, had introduced each other, found themselves vibrating in tune, and shouted, “I need you! Complement me!”

As the weeks after their first meeting had passed, and they got to know more of each other, the subject had been touched on, lightly at first.

They had met, by arrangement, in the College gardens before the evening class began.

“I want you.” He had said. Apropos of nothing. “You want me.”

“I don’t love you,” she had replied, believing it.

“I know that.” Looking into her eyes. Challenging the statement.

“Don’t love me.”

“I can’t help it.”

She withdrew from his gaze, turning away to conceal the pain and bidding her body to be still.

“I shouldn’t have come.”

“Yes you should. Things needed to be said. This way it’s all out in the open, and at least we could be friends.”

“Can you handle that?” she asked, knowing that she couldn’t.

“Yes. I can handle it.” He lied.

“We had better get a move on then. Class starts in ten minutes.”

She forced herself to smile as she stood, lifting the bag of books from the bench.

“Let me.” He said. Reaching to take it from her.

“No. It’s all right. I can manage.”

Silently, they walked the short distance through the garden to the college entrance.

Fred Parry, their pottery class tutor, joined them as they pushed through the swing doors.

“Evening, Mrs Barnes, Mr Ridley. All ready for some hands on tonight, are we?”  Without waiting for a reply he hurried off down the corridor. 

Mr Ridley grinned. “All ready for some hands-on, Alice?”

She coughed to hide her confusion and then smiled.  If this was going to work out, she was going to have to learn to take a joke.

“Yes” she said. “Hands on tonight. I’m really looking forward to my turn on the wheel.”

The pottery class had been dogged by problems since the second week of term, when one of the wheels had locked solid. Despite the best efforts of Fred, it was still temperamental, and the students had to take turns on the other one.

This week had been marked down for Alice. She only hoped that the nervous tension in her body would not reflect itself in her work. She took a deep, mental breath, calming herself as she had learned to do. Hoping that it would be sufficient to carry her through the next three hours.

A sideways glance at Paul told her that he was doing the same. Funny that. They were alike in so many ways, and yet so different.

As he held the classroom door open for her he said, “Coffee later.”

It was a statement, not a question. She nodded, unable to refuse.

That was last week.

And here she was.

She didn’t touch the bell. The door was open and he stood there, waiting.

“No trouble?” He looked down into her eyes, a tall man of heavy build, spreading into late middle age, as she was.

“No. No trouble.” She stepped inside, pushing the door shut behind her, cutting off the final escape route.

“Let me take your coat.” In one easy movement he had slipped it from her shoulders, draped it over a chair, and turned again to look at her.

“Are you quite sure . . .?”

“Yes . . . “

They stepped towards each other. He took her up-turned face in his cupped hands and bent to kiss her . . . It was like a first kiss . . . . and then forever.

Without another word he took her hand and led her through the small living room to his bedroom.

The lighting was dim. The bed neatly made. A vase of flowers on the side table. She noted them with the tiny portion of her mind that still seemed to be functioning.

Slipping off her shoes she felt the soft texture of deep pile carpet between her toes. Sensual. Her body was becoming more like a wobbly blancmange by the minute. He felt it too, she knew. Nothing needed to be said.

Side by side they sat, turned, kissed again, the spark becoming a flame that burned inside, suffusing their entire beings.

In a kiss that became eternity they unbuttoned, unzipped, still mouth to mouth, falling onto the bed, over and around each other. Naked.  (She had worried about that . . . body image . . . wrinkles . . . saggy bits . . . less than perfect skin.)

To find now that it didn’t matter, nothing mattered except the feel of different flesh after all the years of monogamy.

This skin meeting her own. The surprising strength that rippled under the soft exterior of this man.

He kissed her nose, her forehead, her closed eyelids. Trailed lips and tongue down her neck, creating ripples of ecstasy that gradually became waves. She lost herself so completely that she was taking, taking, and not giving . . . always she had given . . .

And he, this man, this lover, always having taken, now gave unreservedly, looking for nothing in return, as the unfettered passion in their souls met the all-consuming fire of the bodies.

Once again, after the millennia since last they met!

Two spirits, flying. Free at last of the final karmic thread, they sped on, to join the third, the other soulmate.

They made the headlines of the local paper.

“Tragic Deaths in Love Triangle”

“Police are baffled by the circumstances surrounding the deaths of three local people.  Peter Barnes, aged 57 years, was found dead in his armchair last Thursday afternoon, apparently having suffered a massive heart attack. A concerned neighbour had contacted police after the daily milk remained on the doorstep.

“It just wasn’t in character,” she told our reporter. “They have a routine. Peter took early retirement because of his health, but Alice works. She always takes the milk in before she leaves. I knew something must be wrong.”

There was no sign of Mrs Barnes at that time, but police were again called out, this time to an address in the centre of town, when the bodies of Paul Ridley, 56 years, and Alice Barnes were discovered by a cleaner.

The ‘Mrs Mopp’ who declined to give her name, said, “I can’t believe it, I really can’t believe it. Such a nice gentleman, and to find him like that . . . it’s awful . .

A police spokesman refused to comment until autopsies had been performed.

It was later ascertained that Mrs Barnes had died from a brain haemorrhage and Paul Ridley from the effects of an un-diagnosed cancer. It was confirmed that they had been found “together in the bedroom”. Times of death in all cases were given as around 10:30 PM Wednesday.  Despite intensive investigation, no evidence of foul play was found. The only link between the three would appear to be the pottery and Art appreciation classes attended by both Mr Ridley and Mrs Barnes on Wednesday evenings.  Funeral services will take place on Friday of this week.”